First of all I would like to apologize from all of those worthless people who have nothing better to do in life than to spend countless hours on facebook. Why am I apologizing? Well because what I am about to tell you all will only make you hate me more but it just might open up those eyes of yours which are deluded with the impression that FB is the only place to socialize. Since E=MC2 and you don’t know the exact value of “π”, I will begin my story about the rise and fall of FB in my life.
I joined and it was as a matter of fact good. I found many friends, co-workers, enemies (whom I have blocked for eternity and randomly report their profile as bogus to the site admin) and relatives (whom I don’t meet in real life but online it fine, as long as I can ignore them). I also found out that this site had applications, many of them. Like hug a friend, send someone a drink, slap someone, kick someone’s ass and so on. I loved it so much that I started sending out emails to my friends to join in as well. Days went by and then suddenly strange things started happening. I started noticing that I was getting way too many invitations from people I did not even know. I started ignoring them. Then I received an email in which FB told me that I was tagged in a photo. Damn, I wanted to know and to my horror, it was the same picture I was trying to hide from everyone and someone whom I did not even know posted it. The irony is, that I was tagged with perfection. It was a conspiracy against me. I had not recovered from this shock that FB decided to revamp itself. I was so used to of the former layout that I got lost once I logged in. I could not find my wall posts, I could not find my pictures, heck I could not even update my own profile. It took me several days to get the hang of it.
Then one fine day, I received a friendship request. It was from someone I never saw or met in my life. I ignored him. Then I got another one from someone else, I ignored him as well. Then it started happening, random people started adding me as a friend. I didn’t know these people. I never met them and I didn’t want to meet them either. Why are they after me? Is it my blog which is bothering them or they have nothing else to do in their life. This was not over yet! People I knew started recommending my old school mates to be added as a friend. Honestly, if I wanted to be friends with them, I would have done so myself ages ago.
There is another thing which always bothers me, i.e. status updates. Yes it was all cool to tell people what was on my mind but I realized that I was updating my status once a week, whereas other people were doing so by the minute. For example, 10:01am – Good Morning, 10:02am – time to brush the teeth, 10:10am – Cereal time…, 10:15am – I need some coffee, 10:30am – Watching my favorite show, 10:40am – Nicky I am calling you, where are you? Comment: 10:41am by Nicky: Sorry I was making notes on my FB…
These people have nothing better to do in life. This is not all here is a list of what a typical FB user would be doing in a day on FB
1. Biting people so that his / her vampire power grows
2. Making alliances with refugees who do not know that people on FB are looking out for them… on FB
3. Making stupid status updates
4. Finding pictures of themselves in their friend’s albums and anonymously tagging themselves so that people would look at their pictures and comment
5. Uploading mobile photos
6. Biting people again
7. Taking a plethora of quizzes and posting only the good ones (where they were not declared retard) on their profile
8. Searching for random people they know so that they can add them an show off how many friends they have on FB to their friends on FB
9. Making groups along with a million just like the one they created thinking that their group will be the most popular. There is a reason the other million groups like theirs is not popular… you do not have to be an Einstein to figure that out
10. Bite some more people before going to bed
I don’t know what is wrong with people, why do they think that they are cool on the Internet and their social circle will strengthen with the growth of number of friends they have on FB. You don’t even meet most of these people in your average life. If the quiz tells you that you are genius then it does not make you one. If you think that by posting “I am feeling sick” would make your boss think that you are really sick when you don’t show up, that’s not true. If you can log on to the Internet and change your status 7:30 in the morning then you can also show up to work. I hate facebook for turning an average person into a person living in a fantasy world…
I just hate it
